things changed

yesterday was my first time to attend the editorial assessment after sir y passed away. and how things have changed since.

during sir y’s time (at least during the span of time that i was made to attend the assessment), the meeting often started later because sir y had difficulty in getting people to pull away from their desks and go to the conference room. but yesterday, not only did it start early, there was also a large attendance (including our editor in chief). i wonder if it was the editors way of remembering sir y, as if to say, “here we go, sir.”

it also seemed to me that the editors were more behaved and quieter than i remember. or maybe people were just having a slow day yesterday, and therefore, calmer.

while listening to our new grammar cop, i found myself staring at her and imagining that sir y was there instead of her. at times, my eyes panned across the room, and i muttered to myself: “this is real. things changed.” i think that i mostly zoned out during the meeting. good thing, no corrections were raised, which was the primary reason i was there.

sir y, things changed. at the surface, it looks like for the better. but i just cannot bring myself to say that anything is better. because you are no longer here.

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