bloody week

and now the end of the week is near. but the bloodshed goes on.

i just finished the profile i’ve been editing/writing since monday. very bloody, indeed. i will be doing another one by he-who-i-refuse-to-name. and it is not helping that my brain is on auto-shutoff mode after lunchtime. hehe.

oh. and i had my period this morning. for more. argh.

i’ve been talking about editing for four days straight now. not good. so i’ll share something totally not work-related today.

i’ve been having weird dreams lately. no blood whatsoever involved. just, uhm, weird.

two nights ago, i dreamed of a small deep pool on top of a sandcastle beside a very big pool. seemed like i own the little pool because i was annoyed when i saw children playing around it. i went up the castle with some girls *who i don’t really know, they don’t even have names, but in my dream i know them. gets?* to send the kids away. while the children where going down, a little girl accidentally fell on the small deep pool. none of the girls i was with know how to swim. in my dream, i know that i can swim but i was unsure if i can save the little girl.

so, i walked around the sandcastle looking for help. there was another girl with me. we were not shouting or talking to the people we passed by. we were not even speaking to each other. but i just know we were looking for help.

after going around the sandcastle for the nth time i noticed a red button with a blue nameplate below that read “lifeguard.” i pressed the button and then there were sirens.

people ran away from the big pool toward all directions. then lifeguards – girls in bikinis and guys in trunks – came out of nowhere. a particularly broody guy-lifeguard approached us.

it turned out that the lifeguards were supposed to serve for the big pool only. and they have a license of some kind, the guy explained, that is why he can’t help us: (1) they are prohibited to deal with accidents other than those that happened in their assigned areas. apparently, they do no have jurisdiction over the small pool. (2) they have to be called on location no later than two minutes after the incident. (3) if by disregarding the two previous premises, the person they tried to rescue dies, they will be apprehended.

i apologized for alarming them but i still begged for him to help us. and he eventually gave in. but when we reached the small pool. someone had already got the little girl out. but i did not saw the little girl. nor did i spot who rescued her. i don’t know if the kid was already dead or still alive.

the lifeguard remained standing beside me as the dream faded to black.

weird, di ba? even more-weird is that i was at peace throughout the dream. very calm and light. no panic. no racing heartbeats.

and then, last night, i am pretty sure i had another weird dream. but all i could remember now is a scene with me standing on green-painted roof. in this one, this time, my heart was heavy. as if in a struggle.


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